My child’s soul – What is my role?

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When it comes to my child’s soul, I can get very confused as to what my role should be. The human part of me wants to correct and protect, while I know deep within myself that he has his own agenda, his very own lessons that he signed on to learn in this lifetime.

I think most parents try to pass on what they have learned, in their own life experience, to their offspring, in hopes of saving them some trials and heartache. It is my belief, however,  that our souls choose to incarnate on this earth for the purpose of growth, learning and connection.

What if my child’s soul knows more than mine does?

Even the most illuminated of parents likely have a difficult time seeing their children as infinite beings. I am becoming more comfortable with this notion each day.

My son is eleven, and sometimes, I swear he could be forty-five! I have absolutely no doubt that I am learning far more from him than he is from me. I think my child’s soul has been around the block a few times.

So here we are, my son and I, two souls on a mission, here on Earth. Our missions may be intertwined, or not. It’s possible our souls have been reincarnating together over many lifetimes. Maybe he was the parent, and I was the child in a previous lifetime.

What is my child’s soul teaching me right now?

Look, I don’t know about you, but of all the people in my life, my kid knows better than anyone else how to push my buttons.

I can be having the best day of my life. I’m flying around on my own shooting star. I’m dancing and twirling through life. I am maintaining this incredibly high vibration, and then…I pick up my child from school.

He is whining and he wants this and he wants that. He is being disrespectful in public and pushing the absolute limits of my sanity. Can you relate to this situation? I bet you can, we have all been there, right?

Life is always our mirror. It makes complete sense that our children will reflect back to us, the things we aren’t appropriately dealing with in our own lives.

What I’m working on and how my child’s soul has upped the ante.

My focus, all day, everyday, is more self-love, more gratitude and more forgiveness, raising my vibration and shining my light. So what is the best way for me to deal with my son’s preteen attitude that sent me tumbling from my shooting star?

Definitely NOT the way I actually did. I got angry and made threats, that he is smart enough to know I won’t keep. And when he was ready to apologize, I wouldn’t accept it. Now we are both upset, hurt and angry with each other.

Sure, it happens and I’m truly okay with it. Open expression of feelings is always welcome in my house. I intentionally make sure my son knows that no matter how angry we get with each other, I love him with everything that I am. NOTHING can EVER change that.

What could I have done better?

I could have forgiven sooner, knowing that forgiveness will benefit my own well-being as well as his. Or not worried so much about what other people might think of me as a parent. If my child had behaved this way at home, rather than in public, I may not have reacted the same way.

I could have realized my anger was more about my own insecurities as a parent than it was about his behavior. Maybe I could have approached the situation from a viewpoint of gratitude. The truth is, I am extremely grateful for the experience of motherhood and all the challenges it brings.

My final conclusion:

We all have a purpose here on Earth. Sometimes we will teach our children. More often, they will teach us. Your child may be an old soul that you have been traveling with for a very long time. That soul deserves your respect and attention.

It may even benefit us to allow our child’s soul to lead from time to time. Who knows what we may learn.

The best I can do for my son is to lead by example. Try to allow him some space to shine his own light. Accept and acknowledge that his inner wisdom comes from the same source mine does. Remember, that with him, as with everyone else, we are in this together!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Love Yourself Awake

Once upon a time, I was easily wounded by what I perceived as another’s rejection. I was all too willing to take everything personally. The slightest comment, or lack thereof, could be considered a deliberate attack.

My ego was, and still is, capable of creating scenarios completely blown out of proportion and based on events that have not actually taken place. I lived my life from a place of fear.

I was afraid of being abandoned, not being good enough and winding up alone. I was so consumed by my fear that I stopped speaking my mind. I kept my mouth shut, acting as if I had no opinions whatsoever.

I had been avoiding conflict for many years in an effort to keep the peace and be likeable. I had become everyone’s doormat! And no one knew the real me. She was hidden from the world.

On the outside I was strong, smart and capable. On the inside, I was a crumpled mess. That is the story of how ego works. The ego is your self-image, the you that you present to the world, and it is an excuse making machine! Here are some of the things my ego told me:

Strong, confident women don’t wear their emotions on their sleeve.

I am better than they are, so there is no need to argue.

I am patient, tolerant and kind. There is no need to hurt someone’s feelings by expressing what I really think.

Everyone has a right to their own opinion and views. It is not my job to judge.

Now, that might not sound so bad, right? Not if it is your ego doing the talking. The ego tells you what you want to believe to keep you in your place. The ego is afraid of change.

Inside of me was a mountain of repressed emotion that was about to become a volcano of spewing anger, judgement and self-loathing. I had embraced becoming the victim.

It oftentimes seems, that as human beings, we gravitate toward the negative. Rather than take responsibility for our actions, feelings and emotions, we want to blame, complain and stay the same.

I am not the same person I was six months ago. In fact, I am dramatically different. I have discovered the “bigger voice” inside of me. My soul-self is awake and I am allowing her to take charge.

Everyone wants to know what the “one thing” is, the key to happiness, the secret to life. I know that secret. The “one thing” is self-love. There is no stronger force for creating joy than learning to love yourself.

 

You can consciously practice gratitude, forgiveness and self-care with positive results even if you haven’t truly achieved a great level of self-love. My article Soul Growth tells of my journey and some of the tools that got me here.

It’s difficult to explain and I know my old self would have had a difficult time grasping the notion, but with self-love comes clarity. The clarity to see what an amazing creation you are and everything and everyone else is too.

The practice of gratitude and forgiveness takes on a new life as well. It seems to come naturally to me now, without so much effort. There is so much more to be thankful for and so much less that requires my forgiveness.

I now know that strong, confident women are not afraid to show their emotions.

We are all equally perfect in our divine creation regardless of how we express ourselves.

I AM patient, tolerant and kind, but that does not mean I have to keep my mouth shut. My opinions matter. The feelings of someone else are their responsibility and, quite frankly, none of my business.

Just as I believe everyone else has a right to their opinions and views, so do I. It is not my job to judge anyone else on what they believe and it is not their job to judge me. My feelings can only be hurt if I believe what is implied.

 

My journey has been amazing and I look forward to all the future holds for me. A word of caution, however, would be that although I love the changes that have taken place and I am deeply grateful for the awakening, it is not always a comfortable place to be.

You still have to feel your emotions, in fact, possibly on a much deeper level than before. I know, for me, I have good days and bad days, just like before. Now, however, my good days are fabulous and my bad days are, well, not so tragic.

My ego can still get the best of me. My soul-self usually prevails if I use my tools. I always have to keep working. If I let my spiritual practice slide, I will fall back asleep.

So I keep practicing, I keep learning and I keep evolving. With every day I am able to do this, the world becomes a brighter, friendlier place, where we can all be ourselves, we are all connected and we are all enough, just as we are.

Smiles and hugs!

 

 

6 things cats know about mindfulness and awareness

I have loved and been owned by cats my whole life, starting at age two. I have come to some conclusions after all these years of studying their antics.

I think we humans can learn quite a bit about living life to the fullest from the cats we share our homes with. Cats are truly mystical creatures and seem to have mastered the art of just being.

They seem to know that their presence in the world is enough. Their only responsibility is to exist and share their glory with the rest of us.

So here is my list of six things cats know about mindfulness and awareness that we humans have yet to learn:

1. Cats know how to live in the present moment.

Cats aren’t worrying about their futures or reliving their pasts. They are present, right here, right now, in this precious moment. The only moment that really matters.

Cats eat when they are hungry, sleep when they are tired and are perfectly content to be still, quiet and simply observe life as it is.

Cats know how to receive love. They are blissfully there, in the now, revelling in the act of receiving your touch. They are not afraid to show you how wonderful it feels for them. What if we could that?

2. Cats know how to forgive.

Cats don’t hold grudges. I have never known a cat to withhold her love from me because I went on vacation that one time and didn’t invite her to go along. Or because I forced him into that little crate and made him go to that place where they poke him with needles. Or because I forgot, that one day, to scoop her litter box.

Cats forgive and forget. They have the ability to move on with enjoying life because their own pleasure is important to them. What if we could do that?

3. Cats always follow their joy.

Cats love to play and amuse themselves and they are capable of creating fun out of nothing at all. They don’t require expensive toys or other beings to enjoy themselves.

A cat will chase a shadow, jump at a flicker of light on the wall or hunt and capture a scrap of paper found hiding behind the chair. They never grow out of this playful nature. Cats love to play throughout their entire lives.

If you have ever spent time watching one of these incredible happiness machines in action, you know they give their all to every playtime they create and they couldn’t be enjoying themselves any more, in that moment. What if we could do that?

4. Cats trust their instincts.

Cats do not spin their mental wheels pondering what their next move should be. They instinctively know and they immediately act on those instincts.

The mind of a cat is not cluttered with thoughts of “I should” or “what will the other cats think about me if I do that?” A cat knows what he wants, in that moment, and he goes for it.

A cat has no ego, she can only be her truest, most authentic self, by instinct. And so it is.

5. Cats know the benefits of spending time in nature.

Many pet cats these days are “indoor only”, meaning they live exclusively indoors and are not allowed to go outside. There are many reasons for this, including keeping them safe from motor vehicles, if you live in the city, keeping them safe from predators, if you live in the country or keeping birds and other wildlife safe from them, which has become a concern for some.

My cats do spend most of their time indoors, however, I find it important for them to have time outside as well, sometimes to the dismay of my neighbors.

Cats are considered to be domesticated, but I can tell you, with absolute certainty, that cats are their best natural selves when outside enjoying all that nature can offer, just as we are.

My cats are not allowed to roam whenever they want and I am diligent about having them inside after dark, but they know that even a short spell outside can contribute to their overall happiness. And they are not shy about asking for it.

6. Cats embody the concept of self-love.

Cats know their worth and demand that the world take notice. You will not find a cat with self-esteem issues.

The one-eyed cat acknowledges his beauty is equal to that pure bred Persian down the street. The three-legged cat knows his power to be equal to the four-legged felines next door. And the stray, homeless kitty knows she is just as worthy of love as the pampered pet inside your home.

Oh what we can learn from our feline friends. I hope you enjoyed this post.

Smiles and hugs.

Gratitude Journal week of 10-15-2017

Sunday 10-15-2017.

Today I am grateful for the quiet and solitude of early morning walks at the lake. For the cottonwood trees that sing to me when I walk. And for the inspiration of nature.

Today I send love and blessings to my ego.

 

Monday  10-16-2017.

Today I am grateful for my son’s inner wisdom and moral compass, which seems well beyond his eleven years. For a clear bright day filled with sunshine. And for Vala’s pumpkin patch, a fall tradition for us. This year I will be sharing this adventure with three pre-teen boys!

Today I send love and blessings to my inner critic.

 

Tuesday  10-17-2017.

Today I am happy and grateful for my back patio garden. For the blue jays outside my window. And for mirror work.

Today I send love and blessings to loud neighbors.

 

Wednesday  10-18-2017.

Today I am grateful for time alone. For new experiences. And for Pinterest.

Today I send love and blessings to President Donald Trump. I know that his presidency has a purpose for our planet, but I just have a difficult time wrapping my head around it.

 

Thursday  10-19-2017.

Today I am grateful for falling leaves. For Rebecca Campbell, her book, Light is the new black, and her playlist!

Today I send love and blessings to my cell phone service. It doesn’t work in my kitchen! Ugh!!

 

Friday  10-20-2017.

Today I am grateful for the my journey. For my vision board. And for the fresh flowers on my table.

Today I send love and blessings to middle school kids who agitate and tease.

 

Saturday  10-21-2017.

Today I am grateful for quiet neighbors. For the support of the universe. And for my JotterPad app.

Today I send love and blessings to all of the haters .

 

Last weeks gratitude journal can be seen here.

 

 

 

Split Yourself Open…Letter To An Old Friend

True self-love is all about forgiveness. The first and most important person to forgive is yourself. It’s important to open yourself wide and look deep inside to the shadows of your soul. Accepting and even embracing the parts of yourself that you would rather hide from the world. These parts are your true blessings. Your flaws and fumbles are what make you human and they also make you, you. This is a letter I wrote a couple of months ago.

Dear Old Friend,

I saw you in my dreams last night and today I am inspired to write this letter to confess and confide in you some truths about our past. You may never read this because I may never send it, but it must be written while I have the courage and motivation to do so.

You have always held a very special place in my heart and I believe you always will. I am so grateful to have had both the pleasure and the pain of sharing a little bit of life with you, as your friend and otherwise. I want to tell you two things. This is difficult for me to admit, even today.

Maybe you remember coming to me one night when we were in our early twenties. I was in a relationship with Russell (name has been changed), our mutual friend at the time. You were hoping for an intimate connection and I turned you away. It wasn’t because I was in love with Russell and it wasn’t because I didn’t love you. I had a secret.

I had contracted the genital Herpes virus from Russell. Of course, I wanted to protect you from that, but I was also protecting myself. This was not something I wanted to share about myself, it would have been too painful. So I chose to hide my truth. Forgive me.

Believe it or not, my next confession was even harder for me to accept. Very deep breath. I lied to you once before and it was a much bigger lie. A HUGE lie. I am so sorry. I have managed to forgive myself and hope, that in time, you can too.

There was no baby. There was no miscarriage. I am tearing up even now as I write this. I made the whole thing up. I recited this lie so many times and for so many years that I may have actually believed it myself.

The first time I admitted to fabricating this story was in therapy about eight years ago. My therapist helped me understand that I was trying to cope with how messed up my family life was at the time. My Mom was put in a nursing home at the age of forty-five and I was being shipped off to another state to live with a father I barely knew.

I loved and admired your family very much. I desperately wanted to be a part of that. So my sixteen year old mind created a family of my very own. A child that didn’t actually exist, except in my mind. A child that gave me a connection to you and to your family. Something for me to cling to when my world got turned upside down.

It was never my intention to cause you pain. I have only ever felt a very deep love for you, your siblings and your folks. I miss you all and think of you often. Finally, at age fifty, I am finding ways to heal my old wounds and get peace. I wish the same for you.

With love, your old friend,

Trish

 

 

Gratitude Journal week of 10-8-2017

Sunday 10-8-2017.

Today I am grateful for the volunteers who run the Saturday night program at Hyde Observatory. Amazing time last night. Thank you! For my son’s great taste in friends. Outstanding kids. And for finally getting this blog live.

Today I send love and blessings to Christina (name has been changed).

 

Monday  10-9-2017.

Today I am grateful for Louise Hay and Hay House Publishing. For phenomenal friends who always stick with me. And for warm throw blankets. Brrr.

Today I send love and blessings to…. honestly, I don’t have anything. What a problem to have! I guess today I will be grateful for not having anyone or anything that is bothering me. So thrilled!

 

Tuesday  10-10-2017.

Today I am grateful for my comfortable bed. For cat fur in my coffee. And for audio books.

Today I send love and blessings to my Veterinary office. My kitty is sick and they couldn’t get us in until tomorrow. ☹️

 

Wednesday  10-11-2017.

Today and everyday, I am grateful to the Universe for loving me. For my black socks. Seriously, today while getting dressed, I thought to myself “I love my black socks”, so they made the list. And for the shimmer of the frost in the early morning sun.

Today I send love and blessings to myself for not always being able to practice what I preach.

 

Thursday  10-12-2017.

Today I am grateful for any and all opportunities presented to me on this day. For the chatter of the birds as the sun rises. And for fall blooming mums.

Today I send love and blessings to whoever thought bubble gum was a good flavor for feline pain medication. Hmmm.

 

Friday  10-13-2017.

Today I am grateful for the hail storm that damaged the car I had purchased just eighteen months earlier. The damage was only cosmetic and the insurance money allowed me to pay off my car loan twenty months early. Today I am eternally grateful for my sick kitty finally eating a decent meal. I hope this means we will have a bit more time together. Thank you. And for a job that allows me flexibility with my hours.

Today I send love and blessings to that roofer again. He is right on the edge of breaking our legal agreement.

 

Saturday  10-14-2017.

Today I am grateful for the colors of autumn. For the smell of autumn. And for cool breezes.

Today I send love and blessings to my former boss.

 

Last weeks gratitude journal can be seen here.

 

 

 

A cat lovers guide to Loving without condition

My son and I share our lives and home with three furry felines. We consider them to be part of our family, therefore they are very spoiled and highly loved. Each cat was adopted and has a very distinct and different personality. Just like most of the people I know, their individual traits have been shaped by both their genes and their environments. And just as I believe that every human is equally worthy and deserving of love, so too are these felines.

Unlike dogs, cats cannot be trained to be a good companion. When you adopt a cat it can be difficult to know exactly what you are going to get as far as personality goes. As with anything in life, it must be entered into with an open heart. I love and respect each of these animals for exactly what they are. Each is a divine and unique creature, as we all are, deserving of comfort and care.

The oldest is a fluffy calico female. She is all sunshine and light, has been her entire nineteen years of life. This one loves humans, other cats and dogs. She was very close to a dog I used to have and they would lay around together and groom each other.

She does not growl, hiss or bite. She purrs loud and pretty much whenever there is another life close to her. She is unaffected by the attitudes or behaviors of her housemates. She allows one cat to hiss and growl at her every time she walks by without a second glance. The other cat is allowed to obsessively play with her tail, without retribution. He has been doing this for over three years. She is not critical of my son for handling her too much or of me for shooing her away because I do not wish to be groomed.

This cat is inherently happy regardless of those around her. I have been blessed to have her as my companion for all these years. What an inspiration for the rest of us!

The middle fur child and also the most recently adopted is a gorgeous purebred Ragdoll with stunning blue eyes. I found this beauty at our local humane society. She is much more dark and shadow than sunshine and light. Simply saying she has an attitude would be completely understating her personality. This cat is vocal, demanding and stand-offish. Sometimes she is downright mean.

Her demeanor has improved greatly in the three years she has been with us. She will now occasionally seek out attention and she allows unsolicited petting as long as it is brief. She will always give a warning before she lashes out. It wasn’t always this way. I bled many times before earning her trust. She has come to know that we will not hurt and we will show her love and kindness that does not require any specific behavior on her part.

The other cats have accepted her as well. We adopted her at seven years old and no information about her life before she joined our family. We are just very thankful that she is with us now and receiving the love she deserves.

My youngest kitty is a black and white male. His coloring exquisitely depicts his disposition. This cat is the absolute perfect balance of light and dark tendencies. He is by far the sweetest cat I have ever known, yet he is also joyfully naughty. He is energetic, curious, intelligent and playful. Hmmm. I might need more human men like this in my life.

This cat is my lap warmer and the source of most of my daily hugs. I like to press him to my ear to listen to and feel his purr. My son can handle him as much and in any way he chooses.

True to his nature, however, this cat does what he pleases, which includes walking on tables and counters, running through house as if he is on fire and trying to “pet” the fish. He will cheerfully antagonize the other cats by showing his perceived dominance, and in the next moment submit by rolling over to expose his belly or cuddling up for a nap.

The day we adopted this precious feline, we had gone to foster home to see his sister. My son plopped down on the floor after we arrived and this cat immediately crawled into his lap and got comfortable. He chose us to be his family. It was meant to be. And I can’t imagine life without him now.

So what do you think? Could you love each of these fur balls unconditionally despite their very unique nature? Do their purrsonalities remind you of any humans you know? Do you or can you love these humans even if they don’t follow your path, knowing that they have been shaped their own genes and experiences which certainly differ from your own?

It’s all about perception. How do you view the people in your life? Choose love.

 

 

How to live a happy life – 13 actions you can take today

I originally intended for this article to be a list of fifteen actions you can take today to live a happier life, but with today being Friday the thirteenth, I thought a list of thirteen might be more appropriate. Enjoy.

1.  Practice Gratitude

It is so easy to take the beauty in life for granted. It seems sometimes that we are built for negativity. Practicing gratitude can be a powerful way to realize how wonderful your life already is. It’s not always easy to feel authentically grateful, especially if things aren’t going your way. The good news is that gratitude can be learned. You can fake it until you make it.

I challenge you to practice gratitude for thirty days. Start a gratitude journal and each morning, for thirty days, list three new things in life that you are thankful for. It can be something huge like divine guidance or something small like warm socks or anything in between. If you would like to see my gratitude journal, it will be posted weekly, for a limited time, on this blog. At the end of your challenge, I would love to know if this practice improved your life and how.

2. Practice Forgiveness

Forgiveness will set you free. Holding a grudge only hurts the person choosing to hold it. Why spend your precious energy all worked up over something you can’t change. The past is done, there is no undoing it. You can’t change the fact that you have been hurt and you can’t force anyone else to change their mind or behavior. What you do have some control over is your own thoughts and actions. Rather than wallowing in your own hostility, why not change the way you think about the situation. Wish your adversary love. Pray for them.

The most important person for you to forgive, is you, and this is often the most difficult task to accomplish. If you can forgive and love yourself, you will find it much easier to forgive others in your life as well.

One good way to get started is to send love and blessings to one person or thing that is irritating you each day. This can be yourself, someone else or not even a person at all. I list mine right after the three things I am grateful for in my journal. Repetition is encouraged on this practice as it may take some time to truly forgive the hurt that runs deep. You will be training your brain by doing this practice daily and it does work.

3. Write your stories.

Start a journal. Writing can be a very powerful tool for healing. Spill your emotions and fears onto the pages in whatever way feels therapeutic to you.  Write poems, write stories, write letters you will never send. Try writing a letter to God, the Universe or your higher self. If you can’t take the chance of someone finding your written words, feel free to burn the page when you are done. What is important is that you release what is bottled inside of you.

4. Learn to say no and yes.

It is time to start saying no to people, events and things that drain you of your life force. It is not your responsibility to deal with other peoples issues. Take care of yourself first. Ask yourself “Am I doing this out of love or out of fear?” For example, are you doing someone a favor because you love them and are happy to help or are doing it because you are afraid the person will think less of you if you don’t? Choose love.

It is time to say yes to your life. Yes to contining to learn everyday. Yes to new experiences. Yes to change. Yes to the things you love. Yes to your intuition and yes to the power of believing in you!

5. Meditate

Start a daily meditation practice. I cannot tell you how much this has helped me to be present, see clearly and remain calm. We spend most of our time either dwelling on the past or looking to the future. The past is over. The future doesn’t exist yet. Now is all that matters. Meditation can teach you to focus on now. A large commitment of time is not required. You can experience the benefits in as little as ten minutes a day. There are many phone apps available for guided meditation. Play around and find something that fits your style. Give it a try.

6. Get out in nature

Go for a walk, or a run or maybe just sit under a tree. Feel the force that connects everything on this planet. Look with wonder at all that you see. Get grounded by walking barefoot on the sand or the grass. Get your toes, or your hands, wet in the stream or the lake. Listen to the wind, the birds, the gravel beneath your feet. Drink it all in. Unplug for just a little while each day. It will be worth it.

7. Do nice things for yourself

Make your happiness a priority. It isn’t selfish to take care of you for a change. In fact, I think it’s necessary if you want to stay healthy. Take the time you need to do the things on this list. You are worth it. Treat yourself to a massage or a little gift, something you’ve had your eye on. Take a class or go out with friends. Indulge in a bit of self-love.

8. Give

It is better to give than to receive. It has been proven that people tend to feel better about themselves if they give to others in need. I personally believe that the more you give, the more you get. The time is always now, even if you feel like you don’t have enough to spead around. No matter what my situation is, I am generous with what I have, there is always someone else who needs more than I do. So donate your money, your time or your stuff. Feel those good vibrations!

9. Spend some time alone

This is never a problem for me. I love my time by myself. Some of you may feel the same way. There is a trick to this, though. You need to be alone without distraction. Yep, that means no television, no texting, no social media. Most people will find it extremely difficult to just be still and quiet with themselves. The reason we are uncomfortable with this is because we will be forced to listen to our own thoughts. When you engage in this practice, be kind to yourself. Remember to practice forgiveness as you do this as well.

There is no better way to become aware of your thoughts and what is truly important to you than being alone without anyone else to influence what is on your mind. If you want to expand on this experience, take a trip by yourself. Go away for a couple of days and only do what you want to do. If this scares you, you may want to ask yourself why.

10. Trust your instincts

Many of us are not willing to act on our instincts or intuition.  We don’t trust ourselves. We may be afraid of failing or of what other people might think of what we are doing. Your intuition is what your soul wants, what your heart desires, it is your higher self giving you inspiration. When you ignore your intuition, you turn your back on your authentic self. Don’t feed your fears. Trust your intuition.

11. Embrace your demons

Have you hugged your demons today? We all have a dark side. If you have taken some of the actions listed above, you may be seeing some of yours by now. This is key to learning self-love. There are parts of ourselves that may be difficult to love, like, or even admit to.  The first step here is awareness. What are you ashamed of? What makes you angry or sad? What are afraid to talk about openly? It may be uncomfortable to acknowledge at first, but it will become easier with time.

The next step is acceptance. No one is perfect. We all have flaws. These perceived imperfections are necessary to the human experience. They are something we all share. Without our darkness, our light would not shine. To experience wholeness you must accept all of yourself.

Finally, it’s time to embrace. Release your shame, your anger, sadness and jealousy by gently trying to see it’s source. Where does it come from? Do not judge yourself. Treat your demons with compassion and understanding.

12. Chase your joy

One of my definitions of joy is watching my son grow, learn and develop in his own way. Another is being curled up with a great book, hot coffee, a blanket and a vibrating cat on my lap. I feel calm, at peace, like everything is right in the world.

What brings you joy? Once you define what that is, start using your energy to chase your joy. My home is rarely as clean as it used to be. Cleaning does not bring me joy. My time is better spent on things that do.

13. Walk into your fear

Whatever you are most afraid of, is what you should be paying the most attention to. Our conscious mind will always choose fear to block us from true awareness. Your authentic gifts can be revealed by facing what scares you. Walk into your fear. Walk into your greatness!

Happy Friday the thirteenth to you!!

Gratitude Journal week of 10-1-2017

Sunday  10-1-2017.

Today I am grateful for the friendship I have with my ex-husband. For the knowledge that eleven year old boys tend to pull away from their moms somewhat and gravitate toward the male role models in their lives and this is normal. And the calico cat that has been my companion for nineteen years.

Today I send love and blessings to the company that sold my refurbished laptop. It may not be human but it definitely has some issues of its own.

 

Monday  10-2-2017.

Today I am grateful for the love fest that happened between my son and our Ragdoll act this morning. The price of admission was running ten minutes behind schedule and totally worth it. For thunderstorms. And for books. I love books!

Today I send love and blessings to the architectural team who created the drawings I am trying to work with at my day job. Smiling through gritted teeth.

 

Tuesday  10-3-2017.

Today I am grateful for my beautiful sister. For occasional playtime with my son, who grows more independent with each day. And for awesome co-workers.

Today I send love and blessings to the father of my fabulous niece.

 

Wednesday  10-4-2017.

Today I am grateful for free on-line classes and lectures. For being able to see the sun rising above the dam when leaving for work. And for great neighbors.

Today I send love and blessings to the driver who was so impatient at the red light that he felt it necessary to blast his horn right outside my open car window.

 

Thursday  10-5-2017.

Today I am grateful for my black and white cat who is always ready for a snuggle right after my alarm goes off in the morning. For umbrellas. And for my cell phone.

Today I send love and blessings to that roofer, again, as I prepare the letter reminding him that his payment is late, again.

 

Friday  10-6-2017.

Today I am so happy and grateful that my roof is not leaking with all this rain. That my thirty year old garage door opener still works. And for the smell of early morning rain.

Today I send love and blessings to anyone who thinks suing someone over contracting a STI to get revenge or monetary gain is acceptable.

 

Saturday  10-7-2017.

Today I am grateful for mornings that don’t require an alarm. For homemade banana muffins. And for the pure bred Ragdoll cat that we were able to adopt at our local humane society.

Today I send love and blessings to my tendency to procrastinate.

 

Please check out last weeks gratitude journal here.

 

 

 

 

Gratitude journal week of 9-25-2017

Monday  9-25-2017

Today I am grateful for: Facebook and the connection to old friends it provides. Motherhood, which is the best thing I have ever done. Jeans, yesterday’s temp was in the nineties but today it is only in the sixties.

Today I send love and blessings to the roofer who scammed me out $2700.00 two years ago and is paying me back very slowly.

 

Tuesday  9-26-2017

Today I thank God for people who care enough about the human condition to speak out. People like Ella Dawson, Hillary Clinton and Amanda de Cadenet.

Today I send love and blessings to all of the ignorant haters that have caused these beautiful women pain and torment.

 

Wednesday  9-27-2017

Today I am grateful for metaphorical puzzle pieces. Those fragments of ideas that don’t make much sense on their own but that I instinctively know will be valuable later on. Motherhood, which is the absolute most difficult and challenging thing I have ever done. Inner wisdom and knowing how to find it!

Today I send love and blessings to anyone who thinks I’m nuts. I can live with that. Your opinion counts too. Maybe I am.

 

Thursday  9-28-2017

Today I am grateful for being able to laugh when I spilled my coffee this morning….onto myself, the counter, the floor, the rug and the cat! Ha! Minor setback, not a major tragedy. The creative ideas that fill my head upon waking. The game of Earth (life).

Today I send blessings to President Donald Trump, the NFL and anyone who is unable to tolerate another’s view or how they choose to express it.

 

Friday  9-29-2017

Today I am grateful for the people who have come before me and paved the way. Fridays at home. Hot pumpkin spice coffee. Yum!

Today I send love and blessings to my fears, my judgements and my negativity!

 

Saturday  9-30-2017

Today I am thankful for subtle intuitive messages and the ability to grasp them. The blessing of being able to live close to a small lake.  The occasional afternoon nap. I will be wanting one of these later today.

Today I send love and blessings to the learning curve I am experiencing to trying to get this blog launched!